Then came
H.R. 5680 (“Ethiopia Freedom, Democracy, and Human Rights Advancement
Act of 2006”) Then there was H.R. 2003 (“Ethiopia Democracy and Accountability
Act of 2007”) which passed in the House last October with a unanimous vote and
sent to the Senate. At each stage, they crowed “Ethiopia human rights legislation is
D.O.A. (dead on arrival) in Congress!” And each time they had to eat crow and
wash it down with French cognac and champagne. They just could not shake it
loose. Ethiopia
human rights legislation in the U.S. Congress has more lives than a herd of
cats. It gets “resurrected” again and again, and marches on forward.
They Just Don’t Get It!
Those guys just don’t get it! First, they said all this human rights stuff in
Congress is the work of the “extreme Diaspora” and “misguided supporters of Eritrea”. When
that claptrap did not work, they tried to pin it on a couple of members of
Congress and their staffers. “The whole thing is the handiwork of Donald Payne
and his aides. And Chris Smith too. They are out to get us! There is no support
for Ethiopia
human rights in the House,” they bellowed. When H.R. 2003 passed unanimously, they said,
“Oh! It’s just the House. There is no support for a human rights bill in the
Senate.” Now that Russ Feingold and Pat Leahy, two of the most distinguished members
of the U.S. Senate, have introduced Senate Bill 3457, what are they going to
say? “Oh, it is not as tough as H.R. 2003! Anyway, the president won’t sign
it!” The simple point is that those guys just don’t get it: Not everyone in the
U.S. Congress is up for sale. You can spend your $50,000 a month, or millions a
year to pay your lobbyists and buy influence in Congress. You can wine and dine
’em. And they can make inane and fatuous speeches for you to an empty Senate
gallery. But there is real and genuine interest and concern for human rights in Ethiopia
in the U.S. Congress. There are American lawmakers who believe that the ideals
of American freedom and liberty can more effectively advance the cause of
democracy and help secure American national interests in the world than military
muscle orcollusion with ruthless
dictators. They just don’t get it. It ain’t about Don Payne, Chris Smith, Russ
Feingold, Pat Leahy or anybody else. It is about freedom, democracy, human
rights and accountability taking center stage in Ethiopian-American relations!
It is just that simple!
The Feingold-Leahy Ethiopia
Human Rights Bill
Feingold-Leahy’s
Senate Bill 3457 (“Support for Democracy and Human Rights in Ethiopia Act of
2008’’), shares the same legislative
justification and evidence as H.R. 2003. S.B. 3457 documents serious, widespread
and extensive human rights violations by the “Government of Ethiopia” in the
aftermath of the 2005 elections. It notes the murder of 193 innocent
demonstrators and injury of 763 others, detention of “thousands more opposition
party leaders and their followers”, “violations of human rights and
international law by the Ethiopian military in Mogadishu and other areas of
Somalia, as well as in the Ogaden region of Ethiopia.” The bill describes the
use of “unjustifiably brutal tactics [by the ‘government’ of Ethiopia]
against its own citizens in Oromiya, Amhara and Gambella regions.” The bill
asserts that the recent so-called civil society law has the effect of
“creat[ing] a complex web of onerous bureaucratic hurdles, draconian criminal
penalties and intrusive powers of surveillance that would further decrease the
political space available for civil society institutions.” Section 5 of the
bill requires the President to take “additional steps to support the implementation
of democracy and governance institutions and organizations in Ethiopia,”
including support for civil society organizations, fundamental freedoms,
bolstering the independence of the judiciary and full international access to
the Ogaden, among other things. The bill provides $20,000,000 for fiscal year
2009 to carry out its purposes. In contrast to the Feingold-Leahy bill, H.R.
2003 imposes stricter limitations on security assistance and travel restrictions
on any official of the government of Ethiopia involved in human rights
violations. To avoid triggering the sanctions provisions, H.R. 2003 requires
the President to report to Congress that the “government” of Ethiopia is making
“quantifiable” progress in specific areas such as the release of political
prisoners, independent operation of the judiciary, free operation of the print
and broadcast media and restructuring of the national elections board to
reflect the political diversity in the country, among others. H.R. 2003 also
provides support for economic development.
Getting to Know Our Senate Sponsors: Feingold of Wisconsin and Leahy of Vermont
The sponsors of S.B. 3457 are not some Johnny-come-lately senators who bumped
into human rights while on a safari to Africa
or on an infant rescue mission from the mouths of hungry canines. Feingold and
Leahy are two of the most distinguished and highly respected members in the
U.S. Senate. Senator Feingold is Chairman of the Senate Subcommittee on Africa and a senior member of the Foreign Relations
Committee. Senator Leahy is Chairman of the Senate Judiciary Committee with full
jurisdiction over the federal justice administration system. Both Feingold and
Leahy have stellar records in international human rights. Both are co-sponsors
of the bipartisan “Genocide Accountability Act” that was signed into law by the
President in December, 2007; and the “Child Soldiers Accountability Act Of
2007”, which a few days ago passed in the House and is now awaiting
presidential signature.
Both Senators Feingold and Leahy have been long time supporters of human
rights in Ethiopia.
Both have made numerous public statements criticizing the regime’s human
right’s record. In his introductory remarks to S.B. 3457, Senator Feingold
said, “The purpose of this bill is to reaffirm policy objectives towards Ethiopia and
encourage greater commitment to the underpinnings of a true democracy — an
independent judiciary and the rule of law, respect for human and political
rights, and an end to restrictions on the media and non-governmental
organizations. As many in this body know, I have spoken numerous times in
recent months about the situation in Ethiopia and I continue to believe
that the U.S.-Ethiopian partnership is very important — one of the more
critical ones given not only our historic relationship but also Ethiopia’s
location in an increasingly strategic region…. Genuine democratic progress in Ethiopia is
essential if we are to have a healthy and positive bilateral relationship. It
is also essential if we are going to successfully combat extremism, thereby
bolstering our own national security here at home.”
Senator Leahy has also issued numerous public statements
urging the regime to immediately and unconditionally release political
prisoners in Ethiopia
and undertake reconciliation talks with opposition leaders in an environment of
fairness and transparency. Citing the New York Times, Senator Leahy has called
for accountability of the Zenawi regime in the diversion of millions of dollars
meant for food aid and a vaccination program. He has criticized the expulsion
of the Red Cross from the Ogaden region and the clampdown on civil society
organizations. He has rejected the Bush Administration’s policy which
has made it possible for dictators to hide behind the skirt of an anti-terrorism
alliance while perpetrating terrorism on their own citizens: “The White House seems to support just about anyone who says
they are against terrorism, no matter how undemocratic or corrupt. It is short
sighted, it tarnishes our image, and it will cost us dearly in the long term.”
Last August, Leahy warned, “We will not ignore the unlawful imprisonment of
political opponents or the mistreatment of journalists. We will not ignore
reports of abuses of civilians by Ethiopian security forces.” Anyone who knows Pat
Leahy knows that he is a man of his word. But Senator Leahy’s peerless contribution to international human
rights is immortalized in the “Leahy Law,” an amendment aimed at increasing the
accountability of foreign military aid recipients that violate the human rights
of their citizens with impunity.It
prohibits funds to “any unit of the security forces of a foreign country if the
Secretary of State has credible evidence that such unit has committed gross
violations of human rights,… and the government of such country is not taking
effective measures to bring the responsible members of the security forces unit
to justice.” This amendment has “become the most important legal tool used to
promote respect for human rights through U.S. security assistance programs.”
Lessons
Learned
After
the House passed H.R. 2003 last October, there has been a palpable mood of
resignation and frustration over the pace of legislative progress on the bill.
Things seemed to have stalled in the Senate and the horizon seemed somewhat
bleak. Many seemed to show signs of impatience, “Why don’t they just pass the
bill and be done with it?” (Most Americans feel the same way about the
traditional way Congress considers legislation.)In some ways, that is a natural reaction to a
process that seems to make progress at a snail’s pace. But for some of us who
have a bit more familiarity with the congressional legislative process, the
view could not have been different. What many saw as slow legislative motion, we
saw as quantum leaps and runaway progress. It often takes years to get a new
bill through Congress. The bicameral legislative processis designed to be completely independent not
only from the executive branch, but also from each other. Each chamber has its
own exclusive rules, procedures and traditions; and final legislative action
takes time. That is a function of the constitutional architecture of the
American republic based on the principle of separation of powers. The American
Founders designed a legislative system to ensure that all proposals receive
careful scrutiny, and that all voices are heard.
We
must understand that Congress is not some rubber-stamp parliament that is at
the beck and call of some political overlord. But there is great wisdom in this
“slow” process. A lot of things happen: A great deal of fact-finding is made by
lawmakers about the subject matter of a bill, constituents get a chance to have
input in the lawmaking process often and at many levels, government agencies
are consulted on the potential impact and consequences of the legislation, consensus
and support for the legislation is built, lawmakers get to debate, argue and
offer amendments, and institutional bargaining and compromising must take place
between the two chambers before a bill is ready for the president’s
signature.It takes many years to go
through this unwieldy process. As the noted congressional scholar Norman
Ornstein observed, “The system of checks and balances and the legislative
process as it evolved in the House and the Senate were built around
deliberation… If there is one word at the core of Congress’ essence, it is
deliberation.” That has been the “deliberative” history of the various versions
of an Ethiopia
human rights bill in Congress beginning with Chris Smith’s H.R. 4423. There fact
that there was not a single dissenting voice in the passage of H.R. 2003 in the
House (despite millions of lobbying dollars spent to defeat it) is testimony to
the outstanding legislative skills and extraordinary hard work of Don Payne
(who got 85 House members to co-sponsor the bill). It took a lot of time and legwork
by Don Payne to get a unanimous vote for H.R. 2003. We are hopeful that the
Senate will act swiftly under its expedited procedures to approve the bill.
So
what are some lessons to be learned from our struggle over the past three
years?
Lesson
1. Never give up. Never Give In.
Churchill was right: “Never give in–never, never, never,
never, in nothing great or small, large or petty, never give in except to
convictions of honour and good sense. Never yield to force; never yield to the
apparently overwhelming might of the enemy.” We must continue to work for this
legislation regardless of how long it takes to pass and become law.
Lesson
2. Act, Don’t React.
Always
act on the basis of the truth. Never lie or misrepresent the facts. But speak
truth to power, to every man, woman and child. Never back down from telling the
truth. The power of truth always overcomes the power of lies. Lies are like a
mirage in the desert. They look real and convincing from a distance but they
vanish when you scrutinize them closely. Truth on the other hand is like a
mountain. The closer you get to it, the more you are able to experience its
magnificence. Never react to lies. Liars want you to react to their lies
thereby distracting you from telling the truth and getting you bogged down in their
lies. React to lies not with the heat of emotion but with the cold hard facts.
Lesson
3.Act Together, Work Together and Think
Together.
When
people act, work and think together they always accomplish their objectives. In
getting a human rights bill to this stage, we acted, worked and thought
together in all sorts of forums. That is why we succeeded to the extent that we
did. That is the power of collective action. Credit for whatever we have
accomplished to date belongs equally to each and every person who did their
best to help advance the cause of Ethiopia human rights in
Congress.If we want to get an Ethiopia human
rights bill enacted, each and every one of us who believes in the cause of
freedom, democracy and human rights must put our shoulders to the grindstone
and keep pushing until we get the job done.
Lesson
4.Speak Out, Speak Up and Often.
Speak out and make a difference. Every chance you get to
talk about human rights in Ethiopia,
just do it. Even if it is one sentence. Talk about it on the phone, in your
email, online chat, in the restaurant, churches, conferences, on the radio and television,
in the local newspaper or wherever you find anyone willing to listen. If you
don’t speak about human rights in Ethiopia, who will?
Lesson
5. Knowledge is Power — Educate
Yourself on the Legislative Process.
Much
of our frustration about what is or is not happening in Congress on Ethiopia human
rights legislation is related to our lack of knowledge and information about
the legislative process. The U.S. Congress is truly one of the greatest
lawmaking institutions in human history. No doubt, it has many flaws — excessive
lobbyist influence, gridlock, partisanship, etc.– but as a law making institution it is
accessible and responsive to its citizens. If we organize and persist — AND SPEAK IN ONE
VOICE — we will find out that our members of Congress and the institution
itself are all ears.
But
when we talk to members of Congress, let’s be more professional: prepare our talking
points, assemble our documentation and evidence, designate our presenters, make
clear, concise and persuasive arguments, be sensitive to the time pressures of
our members of Congress and their staffers, always be respectful and
cooperative and always express appreciation for the opportunity to be heard,
etc. We must avoid the past mistakes of making unkind remarks about each
other’s advocacy efforts as supporters of the same cause and effort. Nothing is
more embarrassing and painful than hearing members or their staffers asking
point blank: “Why can’t you guys work together. It is ineffective and
counterproductive for different groups who support the same cause to come in
and make the same arguments while undercutting others working for the same
purpose. It is a waste of our time and it shows you are not really organized.” Let’s
be more organized.
Lesson 6.Make
Use of the Media to Get Out Our Message.
The
American media can be a great ally in our human rights advocacy efforts. We
learned a great lesson from our efforts in 2006 when then-House speaker Hastert
iced H.R. 5680. We were able to coordinate with the electronic and print media
in Hastert’s congressional district outside Chicago to apply grassroots pressure on him
to let the bill go to the floor for a vote. As most who are aware of that
effort know, the impact of our media work on Hastert’s office was massive and immediate.
It was described as “unprecedented” by Hastert’s staffers. But as luck would
have it, the speaker and his party lost control of the House within weeks. Never
have an event without adequate media coverage.
Lesson
7.Learn and Teach Others.
Human
rights advocacy should not be looked at lightly. To do an effective job, we
must have basic familiarity with the various international human rights
conventions and instruments; we must read and understand the bills. To advocate
on behalf of human rights without reading and understanding the Universal
Declaration of Human Rights or H.R. 2003, H.R. 5680, H.R. 4423 or S.B. 3457
could be embarrassing. We must make an effort to learn about human rights laws
and conventions and share our knowledge with others.
Lesson
8.Be Creative. Think of New Ways to Act.
We
need to think of new ideas and strategies to advance the cause of human rights
in Ethiopia.
For instance, we began pushing for resolutions in the state legislature and
county and local governments on human rights in Ethiopia. Such resolutions were
passed in various state legislatures including Massachusetts, Oregon, Washington, Oklahoma
and other jurisdictions. We need to get similar legislation passed in every American
state legislature. Musicians, artists, scholars, journalists, poets, athletes, cab
drivers, food service workers, lawyers, doctors, engineers and all others can
think and act creatively within the sphere of their knowledge and experience to
promote human rights in Ethiopia. All of us have the power to inspire through
ideas, thoughts, words and imagination. Let’s inspire each other creatively.
Lesson
9. Create Alliances With Other Groups and Support Human Rights Organizations
A
great deal of the evidence buttressing Ethiopia human rights legislation in
Congress is based on the independent work of Amnesty International, Human
Rights Watch, Freedom House, the Ethiopian Human Rights Council and many other
international human rights organizations. Without their work, we would not have
the evidence to make our arguments. But why is that many of us are not members
of one or more of these organizations? For less than the cost of an average
restaurant meal, we can become members and support the great work of these
organizations. These organizations need us as much as we need them. Let’s
become members. We also need to build bridges to other grassroots human rights
and civil rights groups. Our influence is magnified when we act in concert with
others who share the same cause and concerns.
Lesson
10. Gandhi Was Right!
Gandhi
was right: “First, they ignore you. Then they laugh at you. Then they fight
you. Then you win.”
An
Imaginary Conversation Between an Apparatchik and a U.S. Senator (Act I)
The
following is an imaginary telephone conversation that took place between an Ethiopian
apparatchik (a political hack, a flunky, a yes-man)and a U.S. Senator
on the occasion of the introduction of Senate Bill 3457.
Apparatchik: “Senator, I can’t tell you how pissed off we are with
this bill you just introduced. We have been telling our people — as a matter
of fact — the whole world that an Ethiopia human rights bill in the
U.S. Congress is dead and gone. You guys sat on H.R. 2003 for damn near a year
without anything happening. Now you pull off a stunt with this Senate bill on the
eve of our new year and embarrass the hell out of us. What’s up with that,
Senator?”
Senator: “First, let me say happy new year to you. Sorry to rain on
your parade (chuckle). I hope you will not misunderstand because the bill was
not introduced at this time as some sort of new year present to you and yours.
It is all a coincidence. You know, bills have a funny life in the U.S.
Congress.Just as soon as someone writes
their epitaph, they rise from the crypt and come alive. Just like in the
movies, sometimes they become your worst nightmare.”
Apparatchik: “Senator, I don’t get. Just tell me. What is the big
deal about human rights in Ethiopia.
Why should you care? You know everything was fine and dandy until that Chris Smith
in the House messed things up back in ’05 and started talking about human
rights this and human rights that in Ethiopia. Then, Payne runs with his human
rights bill and scores a touchdown in the House. Now, you are carrying the ball
to the end zone for a second touchdown in the Senate. Why are you guys so much
interested in Ethiopia?
Senator: “Surely, you
must know that human rights is a cornerstone of American foreign policy. Our
policy is to promote democracy with our partners around the world as a means of
securing our national interest.We do what we can to assist emerging
democracies in implementing democratic principles and in developing democratic
institutions. We speak out against regimes that deny their citizens fundamental
freedoms. Let’s be honest. What we are proposing here is nothing new. It is all
in your constitution, if you care to check it out. In Article 13 of your
constitution is stated: ‘The fundamental rights and freedoms enumerated in this
Chapter shall be interpreted in a manner consistent with the Universal
Declaration of Human Rights, international human rights covenants and
conventions ratified by Ethiopia.’
All we are doing is help you live up to the standards of your own constitution.
Do you want to talk about it more?”
Apparatchik: “No, I don’t
know what it says in the constitution. I have never read the thing. Anyway, Senator,
I have to tell you how we really feel. Ethiopia is not some banana
republic you can run from Capitol Hill. We are a proud and independent people.
You can’t tell us what to do!”
Senator: “Well, ‘banana republic’
is a term used to describe a country that is politically unstable, dependent on
one primary agricultural commodity — banana or coffee — with a large impoverished
population, and adorned with the trapping of modernity (such as a whole bunch
of empty office buildings) and ruled by a small, self-elected, wealthy and
corrupt clique. Is that what you are not? Anyway, we are not telling you what
to do. All we are saying is the American taxpayer does not have an obligation
to support any regime that engages in widespread violations of human rights. If
you don’t like it, all you have to say is ‘Stop all the aid!’ and you won’t
hear a word from us.”
Apparatchik: “Senator, you
guys picking on us. Aren’t there enough bad guys out there for you to beat up
on like terrorists, or that country to our north or something?”
Senator: “Give me a break!
‘Beating on you!’. No, we leave that to you guys. You are the experts. You beat
up and jail your ordinary citizens who don’t agree with you. You threaten,
harass and intimidate your opposition
leaders. You criminalize civil society organizations. You jail and drive out
independent journalists. And you have the gall to talk about someone beating up
on you!”
Apparatchik: “That’s not what I am talking about, Senator. Anyway, you
must know this bill interferes with Ethiopia‘s internal affairs. Yeah,
you are meddling in the internal affairs of a sovereign nation unfairly and
with no account of the realities on the ground. You are treading on our sovereignty.
It is like you are trying to colonize us. You are telling us that if we do not
improve on human rights, you will cut off funding. What happened to the good
old days when you gave us money and let us do whatever we want with it? What is
all this accountability stuff now?
Senator: “Well, those good old days are gone. It’s a new day. The
American people demand accountability for their tax dollars. We provide aid to
the people of Ethiopia,
not to a political party or faction that is determined to keep its chokehold on
power. You say we are trying to ‘colonize’ you with this bill. At least you did
not call us ‘imperialists’, like they used to in the old days. You have been
telling us that you are our “reliable partners” in the war on terror. Now we have
become your colonial masters? Let the facts speak for themselves. Over the past
decade, we have given you billions in development assistance, disaster, famine and humanitarian relief, economic support,
child survival and health programs, debt relief and much more. You never complained
about being an American colony when you were grabbing the goodies for all these
years. Now, suddenly we have become colonial ogres intruding on your
sovereignty. Give us a break!
Apparatchik: “Let me try it a different way, Senator. You are not
understanding me. We are a key partner in your war on terror. We went after Al
Quieda in Somalia.
We broomed that place squeaky-clean. Not a terrorist in sight. How do you like
that?!”
Senator: “Right. Right. Yeah, we were wondering what had happened to
those wild-eyed terrorists. Anyway, we really appreciate your efforts very
much. But what does that have to do with jailing your opposition political
leaders and journalists, not bringing to justice those who killed innocent
demonstrators, election rigging, political prisoners, misuse of the justice
system for political ends and the rest of it? Look here! We may be partners in
fighting global terrorism, but we are not — and never will be — partners in
your crimes against humanity, war crimes and violations of international human
rights laws.”
Apparatchik: “Well, Senator,
you want democracy, so do we. If you are really interested in promoting
democracy and good governance in Ethiopia, the best way to do it by encouraging
Western companies to invest in our country and help modernize the agricultural
sector. You helped South
Korea when it was under a military
dictatorship and now you help all sorts of anti-democratic Arab countries. You
know we have run three successful
elections. Opposition groups are freely operating in the country and basic
human rights of citizens are respected. Your bill will undermine the Ethiopia‘s
remarkable progress as a young democracy.”
Senator: “(Guffaw! Breaks out in boisterous laughter.) Forgive me,
but how do you define democracy? Running 4 million candidates from one party? Jailing opposition political leaders and keeping
thousands of political prisoners? Incapacitating civil society leaders and
institutions? Jailing independent journalists? Using courts as political tools
of persecution? If that is the accomplishment of your young democracy, I’d be
scared to imagine what it will do when it gets into adulthood.”
Apparatchik: “Senator, we just have to tell our people that you are
trying to starve them by cutting off aid and blame everything on you guys. How
do you like that?”
Senator: “Doggone it! You will stoop that low, eh! What a low down
dirty shame! Do and say what you will. But the U.S. Congress will never deny
humanitarian aid to the people of Ethiopia. NEVER. But rest assured
that we will do what we can to stop you from using our humvees and military aid
to kill off your people.”
Apparatchik: “Check it out Senator. See, we are now going through a national
healing after all of the mess in 2005, with the elections and all I mean. We
pardoned the opposition leaders and let them come to America and do whatever they
wanted. Today, we have hope and optimism that has never happened in Ethiopia
before. If you pass this law, it’s all going down the drain.”
Senator: “Sorry, I did not hear you clearly. Did you say national
healing or stealing? Anyway, we are pleased to see that you have pardoned the
leaders. But we all know that you still have thousands of political prisoners
in detention. When will you be releasing those prisoners?
Apparatchik: “Well, umm! Well…
Apparatchik: “Senator, you can’t go through with this
bill. Ethiopia
faces a rebel movement. There is famine, I mean severe malnutrition. There is
insurgency in the Ogaden. Muslim fundamentalists in neighboring Somalia and Eritrea are
creating chaos. If this bill passes, we, your ally in the war on terror, will
be weak. You will have no supporters in the most dangerous regions in the world.”
Senator: “Here you go again. You don’t really get, do you?
Hello! If you respected the rights of your people, may be you won’t have any
insurgency movements. If you take care of your people, may be they will give
you their full support. Let me give you this guarantee: ‘There will not be a
single insurgency movement or adverse reaction by any opposition group to your
regime because of passage of this bill. And you can take this to the bank’.”
Apparatchik: “Senator, I am going to try one last argument to get
through to you. If you pass this bill it will damage the economic progress we
have made so far. It will interfere with our democratization process andthe Ethiopian renaissance we have started. What
do you think of that?”
Senator: “Not much. The last I read 80 percent of
your people live on pennies a day, much, much less than a dollar. One-third of your population is directly in
the path of an oncoming famine freight train. Who are you kidding? If there is
economic progress, it is there for you and yours. Don’t preach this economic
development drivel to me. I know what’s happening. But let me ask you a few
questions of my own.” Senator: “You have a great constitution. Why can’t you follow it?”
Apparatchik: “Duh! Did you say, constitution? Umm…
yes. Can I get back to you on that question. I need clearance before I can
answer that question.”
Senator: “Alright. You talk about democracy and economic
development. Do you know of any country that has been able to have a successful
democracy with economic development that did not also have a free press and
freely functioning civic society institutions?”
Apparatchik: “Senator, very good question. Right! Umm…
Can I get back to you on that. I need clearance before I can answer that
question.”
Senator: “Let me put things in perspective for you.
Kibaki and Odinga in Kenya
were able to cut a power sharing agreement. Now Mugabe and Tshargari cut a
similar power sharing deal in Zimbabwe.
Why can’t you guys come up with a similar arrangement in Ethiopia?”
Apparatchik: “Senator, that is a radioactive question. I am not going there. Oh! No.
No. No. I am going to have to take the Fifth on this one, as you guys say in America. I
refuse to answer this question on the grounds that I might incriminate myself.”
Senator: “I like your humor there. By the way, when
are you guys getting out of Somalia?
Any plans?
Apparatchik: (Sweating it.) “Senator, I don’t know
nothing about nothing. Why are you asking me all of these questions. Do you
want to get me into trouble? I just want to talk about H.R. 2003 and S.B. 3457
and stuff like that. I am not authorized to talk about anything else.”
Senator: (Laughs!)
Apparatchik: “Senator, you know we don’t care about any law passed in
Congress. It’s is not going to makeone
ounce of difference to us. We’ll just ignore it. We don’t need you measly $20
million. You can keep it. We’ll do something. I don’t know. Just something.”
Senator: “So why are you whining? If is not going to make a damn bit
of difference to you, why are you so worked up? Let it go, man! Forget about
it! Go with the flow. Roll with the punches, dude! Take it easy! Chill!”
Apparatchik: “Oh, man!”
—————————
P.S. Please send a thank you email to Senators Feingold and Leahy, or call
up their offices and just say: “THANK YOU!”
